What can I say? I’m doin something with my life now… I’ve got a job that I love again, I’m going to school for something I wanna do, and I’m actually getting through this fucking legal bullshit peacefully, finally. 

However, I’m still not all that happy… :(

I don’t mind being single, don’t get me wrong… But being alone all the time, and not having anyone there to share things with; emotionally and physically, is really starting to get me down…. I’d really like a boyfriend that isn’t going to treat me bad, and be there for me no matter what. Eh, I’m in Iowa though, one of the few states where same sex marriage is legal, and no one wants the committed relationship… And although there are guys that have been in those, 1 year plus long relationships, NO ONE wants to be in one for that long with me… :( Like seriously, what the fuck is wrong with me? I’m doing something with myself, I put up with a lot of shit, I have a car, I’m independent, and I am NOTHING but loyal to everyone. 

Oh well… Shit happens I guess. Gotta smile, frowning makes ya ugly. lol


I don’t normally go to the bars, because frankly, the gay community around here really pisses me off… I don’t like the whole “take us as who we are, we are people too” speech that all the gay people fucking preach, when in fact, the gay community in itself is one giant fucking cluster fuck of judgement and bullying. Like, hope off your fucking high horse and get real; nothing is going to change unless something inside the “circle” changes first….

But, back on the topic. I don’t normally go to the bars because I don’t normally have fun, but during the last two days I have went with this guy and his friend, and frankly, it’s not that bad if you’re with the right people. 

Sad thing… He just got out of a relationship and doesn’t really wanna date right now (see, I say this because I asked him to a movie and he said so), and so going and hanging out and stuff gets me points, makes me happy and… sad. 

He’s a real good guy. He’s funny, he’s cute, he’s smart, and he’s well educated… Unfortunately, I’ve met guys like this before, so in the long haul I’m happy he said that, because I’ll get to take a look at things better before I try it again… I mean, I’ve only known him for like a week now. Eh. I guess I’ll see.

I’m really enjoying school, I’m on the floor now and it’s great! Yay! :]

February 25, 2012

So…. It snowed something fierce last night, only to have melted by noon today… 

I called in at school (blaming it on the ice), because I just didn’t want to do more perms…. GAH! I hate perms, but we start coloring on Tuesday, and for that I AM SOOOO FUCKING EXCITED! 

I got paid today; man how I really hate the fucking pay cut that I took due to school starting, but I gotta start somewhere to get somewhere. 

I took this paycheck as a sign to go get another “Nicki Minaj OPI” polish. LOVE THEM ALL! “Pink Friday” is definitely my favorite, but I really like “Fly” (blue), “Did It On ‘Em” (green-ish yellow), “Save Me” (confetti glitter)[this is the one that I got today]. I still need to get the last two (“Super Bass” shatter [purple] and “Moment For Life” [black and silver glitter]), but I figure that since there was an abundance of them at the beauty supply store I could probably pick them up later; BUT I do NEED to go get a couple of more bottles of “Pink Friday” (definitely my favorite color of all my nail polishes!), before they run out (since the Nicki Minaj line isn’t a permanent color line).

I got to go to Goodwill and get 7 new ugly sweaters (pictures pending; promise to post some) for less than 20$!!! FUCK YEAH RIGHT???

I also went to The Funky Zebra (a boutique in Ankeny, Iowa) and bought a kick ass owl ring and a pair of MissChic jeans (knock off Miss Me jeans)! Be-Dazzled ass and everything! WAYYYYYY cheaper than if I were to buy a pair of Miss Mes. Gotta go back there after I get paid again. There is a zebra print and rhinestoned belt that I want; but Ima have to save up for it, because it is definitely like, 70$!!! Wayyyy too much to spend on it all at once! 

But other than work, that is really all that was exciting event wise….

However. My love life is still lacking, and it’s starting to really bring my down emotionally… I really just want someone to be there. Even if we aren’t an official couple; any type of relationship/companionship would be fucking great right now! But like Dr. Lou from Matrix told us on Wednesday… “I AM ALIVE. AND IT’S JUST AN INCONVENIENCE, NOT A TRAGEDY” 

Well ladies and gents, it was nice informing… Love ya’ll! :o  

February 24, 2012

So. It’s been like, 50 degrees here in Iowa for like the last two months, and all of a sudden last night we get a snow and ice storm. Fuck our lives right? 

Other than that, I started beauty school about a month ago and I love it! One month and I’ll be on the clinic floor cutting/coloring/styling hair! YAY! 

Boys still suck in like of me, but it’s whatever, “I’m alive!”.


Floral tea cup…


Floral tea cup…

(via shoelust)